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Tech Debt will be switching positions to a user-created pornography website in the coming weeks, the wildly popular tech news site announced to a hand-picked group of reporters. The shocking change of positions comes after popular user-created content subscription platform OnlyFans announced they would no longer be allowing sexually explicit content.
“While it’s very rewarding to help billions of readers get off to a good start every day, we see this as just another way to help people satisfy their needs, so it is still in line with our company mission. We are new to this space, but we see ourselves as standing erect, held up by many strong partners. Ultimately we will plow the competition on our way to success.”
Venture capital firms also seem to think Tech Debt is a money shot, investing nearly $10 million into the unicorn shortly after the announcement. The amateur entrant will need to beat off the burgeoning competition, with a train of big business corporations jostling to enter the space. It remains to be seen how this will shake out, and who gets shafted, but one thing is certain: people will get their porn.